May Chit Chat
by Linda Suit
Hiya everybody! I missed you. Would ya look at this stuff? It's not ready yet this year but we do have baby maters (my favorite thing to snatch and run), squash, and a few other things growing out there, so hopefully later this month I'll be zucchini tree climbing again!
Hey you little rascal, get down off that door. Mommy has to feed me before you and the Doodle Bugs get fed. That's the rules! Really Mom E. Doodle (a/k/a Scruff E), you think you're coming in here? Nope, not happening. I kinda felt bad not letting her in to play but can you imagine Mommy chasing both of us with Doodle Bugs running everywhere? That girl is a wee bit round in the middle so maybe she needs some of this salad stuff to eat for a while! And Fox E is still coming and doing her best to become Queen of Outdoor Doodleville.
Who's been the best Doodle here today? Well, what a silly question...me of course! I did my usual morning routine of aerobics, space jumping in the kitchen, running faster than the speed of sound, barrel rolling in the floor, and then snuggling with Mommy. Whew, I'm tired. Hey, remember I asked who wanted to sign up for the Spunky Spa? Well, I'm still waiting! Hmmph, I think Mom E. Doodle needs to join or I'm gonna rename her Fat E. Doodle. That girl has turned into a beggar big time and now Jerry Boy is even falling for it. Mommy has to run off the Doodle Bugs to get out the sliding door! Guess what Jerry Boy did to my cousins? Ha ha ha, he put some roofing metal around the base of the pear tree and one of the pecan trees. Figure that one out ya little Doodles! Betcha can't climb up there now! Maybe I'll get some this fall.
Jerry Boy has been trying to get the new pump ready to water the garden and Mommy was out there playing in goat tea. If you don't know what that is, you probably don't wanna know. I'll give you a hint. When she came in I ran inside my nite nite box and held my nose. Peeeeuuuuuuu, Mommy, YOU STINK! Good thing Jerry Boy can't smell. Go take a shower will ya or I'm not letting you near me! Ick ick ick!!! Mommies are not supposed to smell like that. And what did she do with the goat tea, you ask? Why she put it around veggies so they will grow big and strong. Hmmm, you sure you wanna eat those things after that? Might just want to leave them all out for me, but will ya at least give them a good bath first?
Whoo whee I'm having a blast! Mommy said I could play with supervision, but I'm not supposed to bite off any noses or tags. Oops, sorry about that Piglet. This is just too much fun. Can you even find me? There must be hundreds of these critters in here. I'm waiting for Mommy to look the other way and we're gonna have another dance party. I need to practice for Dancing With The Stars!
This morning Mommy had a contraption that holds a long skinny colander and it looked like a kind of jungle Jim to play on so I took it for a spin, umm, literally. I climbed on the little bars, swung upside down, went kerflop, crawled through the hole in the bottom, hung by one foot. Jerry Boy was laughing so hard he almost fell outta his chair. Mommy thought it was totally cute and forgot to video it. Scruff E was watching me from the door and I was just playing my widdle heart out. Whee, what fun.
We have new residents in Doodleville! Mommy went out a few nights ago to check on the goaties, closed the door to their house and there hanging on the tree right by her hand were three widdle baby possums! Aww. One was squished between the tree and the side of the house, another right by her hand, and the third peeping out from behind the tree. Jerry Boy went out the next night and one of the babies was hiding under Romeo's bed. I named them Hissy, Lizzy and Dizzy. We had a Jack Wabbit that lived under there and she had a baby wabbit. Hmm, maybe she is a Jill Wabbit? Anywho, they are not out there any more since the new residents moved in. I'm sad cause I liked the wabbits.
I have been the bestest little girly squirrel ever. I am in a Mommy cuddling mood. I still have my Jerry chats a couple of times a day. Mommy holds me and he talks to me and I just look at him with my big beautiful black eyes, then he stops I always pop my head up and look at him like, hey, why'd you stop talking? Then I run under Mommy's shirt & snuggle, popping out once in a while to give smoochies.
Oh those goaties have been a big bratty mess. What are we gonna do with them? Jazzy sounds like part pig snorting. She blubbers and flaps her tongue. Girl, where are your manners? Were you born in a barn? Oh and that Juliet...there are just no words...well let me try, but this is gonna be a tough one. She starts with her maaaaa but then bellows, moans, groans, growls that guttaral (I'm only a squirrel and don't spell good sometimes) skeery demonic growling noise. Getting the picture? If you heard it in the dark you would think a space ship had landed and the demons from the dark side had done possessed that girl. Mommy said she needs an exorcism...or something. Oh, she likes to do her own hair too...see the picture?
Miss Libby Long Legs just bounces around everywhere, little hornless princess, but she can pick the others up with her head and lift their backsides in the air. Then she runs like the wind. Ha ha ha ha she says. Of course she expects Mommy to protect her. And Sir Romeo? Well, he still thinks he's Mr. Pretty Boy (actually he is), and he wants all the attention so he shoos the others away from Mommy and Jerry Boy. So, it's rodeo time whenever they're around. Oh you should see Mommy when she's trying to catch one of them to do stuff to them. Yee haw. Mommy's old ya know and she can't outrun the goaties, so she has to try to outsmart them. Good luck with that one, Mommy.
I hope everyone has a good month and I'll see ya next time when life in Doodleville continues. You never know what will happen next!
About the Author
Linda Suit is a city girl turned country. A travel agent by trade, she and her husband, Jerry, live in rural Arkansas with their animals including an amazing pet squirrel, Spunky Doodle. Spunky has brightened the lives of many with her stories. She is quite a character and definitely lives up to her name of Spunky.
Linda has traveled the world. Her passion for missions comes alive in her stories from remote areas. She will make you laugh and tug at your heartstrings.
You can read Linda’s “Spunky Tales” column on the 2nd Saturday each month here at Mustard Seed Sentinel.