Faith & Life: Stop Judging Others

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Stop Judging Others

Love Them and Pray Instead

by J.M. Troppello

Judging others is not a good thing.

It can cause issues for your relationships and hinder growth in your spiritual life. During part of the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus had some strong words to say about not judging others. I love how in Matthew 7:2, Jesus said that with the ‘measure you use, it will be measured back to you.’

“Judge not, that you be not judged. 2 For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. 3 And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye? 5 Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. (Matthew 7:1-5, NKJV)

My husband and I have had many conversations about judging others and why we shouldn’t judge people. I tend to see things in the ‘gray’ areas. My husband sees things in ‘black and white’ areas. I have a tendency to be more merciful—which has gotten me into trouble with allowing people to walk all over me. My husband is more of a realist. He has had more issues with calling things out than I have had. That’s caused him problems with being more easily offended than me.

Yet, God knew what He was doing when He brought us together. My husband has helped me to stand up for myself more. He’s said that I’ve had an influence on him to offer more grace to others.

In our discussions about this issue, we’ve come up with 4 ways to stop judging people and start loving them more. We’re both still a work in progress in this area. However, we’ve been able to offer more grace to others.

1. Pray

Don’t judge people. That’s not your place. I know. It can be extremely difficult to walk in grace—especially when dealing with ignorant or annoying people. Focus on praying for people instead of lashing out at them in judgment. Don’t talk about them and their stupid behavior with other people. Sure, you may need to vent to someone in confidence about how you feel, but don’t allow gossip to creep in on you. Pray and ask God to speak to this person and enlighten them.

2. Love

Leave the judgment and conviction to God. Choose kindness and love instead. Yes, this is difficult. Yet, God has called His children to love others and not live in an attitude of continual judgment. Ask God to help you love the difficult people in your life. Loving is different than accepting sinful behavior. Of course, you’re not supposed to love the sin, but you need to love the sinner. Remember no one is perfect. Not you. Not me.

3. Example

Pay attention to cultivating your walk with the Lord. Be an example to other people—both those who are saved and those who aren’t saved. Don’t ‘bash people over the head’ with the Bible. Your walk with the Lord will flourish when you read the Bible, pray, and worship God daily. Just as you need to cultivate your relationship with your spouse or significant other, so you’ll need to nourish your walk with God.

4. Trust

Have faith that when you pray about someone, that God will hear your prayer and speak to them. You don’t need to preach to them. Sure, you can share the truth of God’s Word in love (read Ephesians 4:15). However, you must trust that God is working in their life just as He’s working in yours. Trust that God is molding you into a more mature Christian each day.

Love and Pray for Others

You can stop judging others, but it will take hard work. Make a diligent effort in building your relationship with God. Focus on His will for your life and all that He has for you to do. Above all, love others and pray for them. Trust that God is continually working in people’s lives.

Article syndicated by Mustard Seed Sentinel on


About the Author

JM Troppello at Mustard Seed Sentinel

J.M. Troppello is an author, writer, and poet. She is the publisher of the online Christian lifestyle magazine, Mustard Seed Sentinel.

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