Life Balance: 5 Types of Toxic Behavior

Woman with short black hair in a white t shirt who is mad
Credit: Engin Akyurt

5 Types of Toxic Behavior

Choose Emotional Maturity Instead

by J.M. Troppello

“We teach people how to treat us.” – Dr. Phil McGraw

I used to exhibit toxic behavior.

I could blame it on the dysfunctional family situation that I grew up in. For years, I did blame my behavior on what I learned from my childhood. However, once I became more emotionally mature, I realized that cultivating the victim mentality was not getting me anywhere productive.

I needed to cultivate a mindset of the victor.

Sure, I had a lot of reasons to marinate in my toxicity. I grew up with an alcoholic father. I learned that yelling and arguing was the only way to get what I wanted. I was sexually abused as a young woman.

Yet, once I finally took responsibility for my own actions, things started to change for the better in my life. Sure, I still falter and fall back into my immature ways at times. Although, for the most part, I have let go of my toxic behavior and chosen the path of emotional intelligence.

Have you exhibited toxic behavior in your life?

Consider the following 5 toxic behaviors—and choose positive behaviors over these negative ones.

“People inspire you, or they drain you. Pick them wisely.” – Hans F. Hasen

1. Emotional Immaturity

A big sign that you are emotionally immature is that you react rather than respond to people, things, or circumstances. You scream or throw tantrums. You interrupt people and don’t want to listen to reason.

Selfishness is at the core of this immaturity. You want what you want, and you want it now—regardless of who gets hurt in the process. You haven’t yet developed good listening skills. You’d rather talk over people just to get your words out.

2. Obsessive Jealousy

Jealousy will only hurt you in the long run. It is an ugly and unproductive emotion. Allowing jealousy to consume you will derail your life. It will blind you from seeing the beautiful people and things that are already in your life.

Being jealous takes time and energy. You should be spending that energy on growing as a mature individual. You need to spend that energy on cultivating positive relationships in your life. Don’t allow the toxic emotion of jealousy to rule your heart and mind.

3. Jumping to Conclusions

This behavior has been playing out in our world more and more each day—especially through social media. An article gets tweeted out. There are false claims in it. Yet it gets thousands of retweets and shares before the truth ever comes to light. People so easily jump to conclusions without first knowing all the facts.

This happens on all sides of the political spectrum and religious or ideological beliefs. You can avoid jumping to conclusions by allowing yourself to be led by the truth. Do your own homework. Maintain a rational mindset. Think for yourself. Don’t become a cog in the machine of partisan politics.

4. Victim Mentality

I speak from experience that living with a victim mentality will not help you become a productive member of society. It will lead to anxiety, fear, low self-esteem, anger, and immature behavior.

When you can work through the dark parts of your past and start to see the light at the end of the tunnel, you are ready to begin cultivating a victor mentality. Don’t allow the toxic things that happened to you in the past to rule your present and your future.

5. Absence of Compassion

I was bullied as a child for my beliefs and how I looked. I wore glasses (and still do today) and was not one of the popular kids. I know what it feels like to be bullied. However, I learned not to wallow in the victim mentality of that past.

What I went through has served to further open my heart to compassion for others. I don’t like when people are bullied. I can’t change the world. However, I can be a light of love and positivity in my own circle of influence. That circle includes my family, friends, and people who read my content online.

This world needs more love and compassion.

I hope you can open your heart to developing more kindness for others—especially for people that you don’t understand or agree with.

Don’t Be a Toxic Person

“If you attach to the negative behavior of others, it brings you down to their level.” – Guru Singh

There are so many toxic traits you can exhibit—if you want to stagnant in negativity and ruin all your personal and professional relationships.

Don’t be a toxic person.

Focus on developing a higher level of emotional intelligence. Refrain from giving in to the base behavior of obsessive jealousy. Stop jumping to conclusions without knowing all the facts. Cultivate a victor mentality. Develop a genuine sense of compassion for your fellow human beings, regardless of whether you agree with them.


About the Author

J.M. Troppello in a hat covering half her face

J.M. Troppello is an author, writer, and poet. She is the publisher of the online Christian lifestyle magazine, Mustard Seed Sentinel.

Connect with the author on Twitter. You can find her on these social media channels—Twitter, Facebook, Parler, Spreely, Instagram, LinkedIn, and Clouthub. Visit the Mustard Seed Sentinel YouTube Channel. Visit MSS Live Well Corner and our Ko-Fi MSS Community.