Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Compare Yourself to Others
It Only Serves to Make You Feel Like a Failure
by J.M. Troppello
“Don’t compare your progress with that of others. We all need our own time to travel our own distance.” – Jerry Corstens
Comparing yourself to others never pays off. For many years, I’ve had issues with comparing myself to other people. Others were succeeding faster than I was progressing.
When I compared myself to how well others were doing, I felt like a failure. Consider the following reasons why you should not compare yourself to other people.
CAVEAT: It is okay to look to the success of others and evaluate how they achieved their goals. However, that’s a dangerous road—especially if you become obsessed with comparing your progress with theirs. You need a balance in the comparisons.
1. Makes You Feel Like a Failure
The biggest reason to stop comparing yourself to others is that it can easily make you feel like a failure.
I had to stop spending so much time on social media scrolling through the newsfeeds. Seeing the ‘happy’ posts on Facebook and all the filtered posts on Instagram started making me jealous. I felt like I wasn’t succeeding in life like everyone else was succeeding.
You probably heard the popular idiom:
“The grass is always greener on the other side.”
According to WritingExplained.com, “That idiom has been popular since the early 1900s. The following song, The Grass is Always Greener in the Other Fellow’s Yard was recorded in 1924 by Raymond B. Egan and Richard A. Whiting.”
My husband and I were watching a TV show (I can’t remember which one). A character on the show said something like if the grass is greener on the other side, water your own (paraphrased).
The bottom line is that comparing yourself makes you feel bad. Don’t do it. Focus on watering your own grass and finding success in life.
2. Robs You of Your Hope
When you compare yourself to others, that can make you feel hopeless. I have definitely felt this hopelessness before—especially regarding my career. I’ve been working in my career for 20 years. My success has been slow.
I’ve messed myself up by comparing my limited success to the profound success of others in my field. I had to shake myself out of this negative habit. Once I started focusing on the fact that any progress is still progress, that dramatically changed my mindset.
I started having hope again.
I realized that I needed to have a micro focus and a macro focus on my life.
I needed to reward myself for the little successes while I was waiting for the bigger success to come. Don’t allow comparisons to rob you of your hope.
3. Derails Your Focus
Comparing yourself to others will derail your focus. It will sidetrack you from accomplishing your goals. The compounding of feeling like a failure and being robbed of hope will keep you stagnated in the mud.
Stagnation won’t help you progress further. You won’t have the drive to succeed. You’ll start to think that there is no use trying because you’re never going to succeed.
Focusing on each step of progress that you make—and on each immediate, short-term, and long-term goal—will help you to forge your own pathway toward success.
Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
“Stop comparing yourself with others. If they are good at something, you too are good at something else. Self-confidence is not measured by your own capabilities versus that of others, but by your own needs.” – Stephen Richards
Make a choice today to stop comparing yourself to others. Turn your feelings of failure into hope, as you stay focused on accomplishing your goals.
Article syndicated by Inspiration Realm on Medium.com.
About the Author
J.M. Troppello is an author, writer, and poet. She is the publisher of the online Christian lifestyle magazine, Mustard Seed Sentinel.
Connect with the author on Twitter. You can find her on these social media channels—Twitter, Facebook, Parler, Spreely, Instagram, LinkedIn, and Clouthub. Visit the Mustard Seed Sentinel YouTube Channel. Visit MSS Live Well Corner and our Ko-Fi MSS Community.