Just Doodling Around
by Linda Suit
Well, here we are, it's almost Valentine's Day so I gotta start getting my flower orders ready. The only problem is I like flowers, so I eat up a lot of my profits! Oh wait, I know...I can use silk ones. I don't like to eat those. Problem solved!
Ice storm, February 2022, we are not amused. Miss LLL keeps demanding to come in the house and she's doing a pretty good job of it. Mommy told her she had to wipe her feet first. Ya, good one, Mommy. We lost power and had a nice fire going. It was cold in the goatie house so they, yes I said they, demanded to come in. Here comes Miss LLL with Juliet right behind her. Jerry Boy let them in! Ok come on in the kitchen for a cracker and out the back door! Ha ha, another good one, Mommy! So, Mommy has to get one at a time out the door, and it's COLD and spitting ugly stuff outta the sky. Mommy opens the door enough to get one goatie out. Juliet happened to be first in line but didn't want to go (don't blame her). Well Miss LLL decide to help her, backed up and rammed her in the backside, pushing her out the door. Now you know why they call it butting! One goatie down. Miss LLL says, nope, not going, so Jerry Boy has to come in and help with the rodeo. Remember the big kitchen island? LLL spied some goodies in the nice glass cake dish up there and had her front feet up trying to grab onto the paper sticking out! Ruh roh! That dish is OLD and if you break it, you just might find out how cold that creek really is. Mommy wuvs you but...finally got her out...a few minutes later here she comes in the front door again! I think it's a revolving door.
Poor Notch E Doodle is getting cold feet out there on the ice. See his ear? That's how he got his name. He eats out of Mommy's hand and is a sweet boy, but Mommy won't let me play with boys.
It was so slick Mommy had to put straw down so she and Jerry Boy could get in and out of the goatie house without slip sliding away. Lots of limbs broken. Thank goodness it has stopped participating...or percolating...or reciprocating...or reticulating..or parsnipulating (oh wait, I think that's a vegetable)...uggh, what is that word I'm looking for? I'm only a Doodle, ya know, but I can spell better than...well never mind. I see a ray of sunshine and hope it warms up. This is not our favorite time of year. I think I'll just hang out in a sunbeam and pontificate...here we go again, searching my brain for a word...oh yeah, ponder, that's it!
If flower arranging doesn't work out, I have another idea. I think I'll become a Tech E. Doodle. I will of course need an assistant. His/her name will be Oops E. Doodle. In the unlikely event I make a mistake, guess whose fault it will be? You all know how much trouble Mommy has with with tech stuff right? Let's just say she's a bit umm, limited in that department. She does have some good qualities, like...hmm, I'm thinking, I'm thinking. Here she comes, I'm running! Just kidding, Mommy, can't you take a joke? How much should I charge for my techie skills? I think I'll charge $500 an hour. That's pretty reasonable for someone with my skills. Oh, so you want an itemized bill cause you think all I did was tinker?
Okie dokie, Tech E. Doodle at your service. I charge $50 an hour for tinkering. The other $450 was for knowing where to tinker. So there ya have it. Good explanation huh? So, what prompted all this Tech E. Doodle stuff? It seems yesterday there were a couple of problems. First the cord to Mommy's tablet wouldn't work when she tried to transfer some pictures to the big puter. On closer inspection it seems there were some teeth marks around the cord. I have no idea how that happened. Just cause it was right there near the window in her office where I spend a lot of time doesn't mean I had any knowledge of it, right? Could have been a mouse that sneaked in and nibbled on it. Oh ya, and the TV in the kitchen suddenly and mysteriously quit working. Jerry Boy couldn't fix it, Mommy couldn't fix it (no surprise there). So, after a day with no kitchen TV, Mommy gets Jerry Boy on the phone with Dish. It seems there was a button pushed on the side of the TV that changed a setting. Well just cause that's in the middle of my racetrack does not mean I am responsible for that either! Must have been a Big Foot Mouse! Enter Oops E. Doodle. Come on, Oops E, help me out here will ya? I'm kinda sorta in a wee bit of trouble.
So, if ya need a Tech specialist who ya gonna call? Tech E. Doodle! I'll even give my buddies a discount. What, you think I need more practice...well I'm not so sure Mommy will agree to that cause I think I saw a wee bit of steam coming out from under her hair this afternoon.
Mommy says I'm a wild thing! Who me? I usually crawl in the light fixture over the breakfast table, but I think I saw a mouse in the house, so I had to climb high and get a better look. Umm, Mommy, we don't need a mouse, I do not play well with others ya know. I'm telling ya now I'm going to my cache of weapons and see what I've got. This thing's gotta go. I know I'm bigger, but this is not a good thing to have a critter running around. We'll get him but we must be very careful, so I remember where we set our land mines or whatever we decide to use so I don't get caught and blown to bits!
Remember me talking about learning to fly? Flying isn't the problem, it's the landing that makes me see more Mommies than I can handle. I was in the kitchen and decided to try out the ceiling fan to see if I could get liftoff from it. Well, I figured out how to pull the chain and turn it on! Whoa, what a ride!!! Help Mommy! How do I get this off this thing? Yikes! Nobody told me it would go round and round, like FAST! Now I'm gonna have to change my name to Drunk E. Doodle. Whee! Ran into the door again!
Hoping it is warmer when we see ya next month, when Spunky Tales continues!
About the Author
Linda Suit is a city girl turned country. A travel agent by trade, she and her husband, Jerry, live in rural Arkansas with their animals including an amazing pet squirrel, Spunky Doodle. Spunky has brightened the lives of many with her stories. She is quite a character and definitely lives up to her name of Spunky.
Linda has traveled the world. Her passion for missions comes alive in her stories from remote areas. She will make you laugh and tug at your heartstrings.
You can read Linda’s “Spunky Tales” column on the 2nd Saturday each month here at Mustard Seed Sentinel.